You'll Never Be Alone
by StuckInThePast
Summary: Don't hate me for this, but it's a deathfic. Now translated into Chinese! tieba(dot)baidu(dot)com/p/2022574268?fr itb feed jin
1. Chapter 1

John shifted and tried to turn on the bed, coughing and spluttering as he did so, but completely ignoring the nurse's protests.

"Anna," he whispered.

"Yes, John," Anna answered, biting her lip to keep the sobs inside, "I'm here."

John reached out a hand; Anna took it between her two. The nurse, bless her, was clearing the room, and someone had found Anna a seat. She slipped into it gratefully, pressing his hand against her lips and her cheek. They were alone now, and tears did fall, pouring from her with tortured sobs as she leaned forward to bury her face in her husband's neck, as she had done so many times before.

John slipped an arm around her as best he could, holding her in place. "Join me," he pleaded, and slowly, hindered by her own blurred vision, Anna climbed into the bed beside him. She on the left and he on the right – just like always.

Anna's thoughts were interrupted as, wrapping herself around John (for the last time), she felt a dampness on her neck.

"John?" She twisted herself to look at him without pulling away. The look on his face was heartbreaking, and as she kissed his tears away she felt that this heart of hers was never going to begin to heal.

"Anna," he whispered, "I'm so afraid."

Anna knew the depth and significance of what he was saying. He'd only used those words a few times, and only ever to her. In times of war, mostly, when anything might happen. She understood his fear. She was afraid, too. But she wasn't going to let her husband be unhappy, not now (in his last few hours – minutes, even).

"Hush now," she murmured, kissing his forehead softly and bringing up a hand to caress his face. "Don't be afraid. You've been so wonderful in this life, you're going to be wonderful in the next."

"Anna, the things that I've done-"

"Are over," she said firmly, interrupting him with a tender kiss. "You turned your life around, John. I'm so proud-" But no, she couldn't finish. The magnitude of the situation had finally overwhelmed her, and she buried her face in his chest, broken sobs shaking her body violently. John's feeble arms tightened around her, and she could feel him crying along with her.

"I don't want to leave you," he managed after a minute. Anna looked up at him, tilting his head against his chest. "You're not," she said, trying not to sniffle too obviously. "You'll always be in my heart. It's going to be all right, John, I promise."

John nodded against her, but it turned into a vigorous and frightening coughing fit. Forcing herself to work through her tears, Anna carefully wiped the blood away and held him close to her heart. There they stayed in silence for a few minutes, and then John turned to look at her once more.

"I love you," he said quietly, lifting a hand to her face. "So much. I've always loved you, Anna, from long before you knew. You made me so much better than I was. You've given me everything I could possibly want out of life and so much more. I almost wish I could take you with me."

"I wish it, too," she choked out. "John, I don't think I can go on like this without you…"

"Shh, none of that." John reached for one of her hands with his free one, and pressed it to his lips and cheek, a reversal of their roles not long ago. They had always comforted one another. "You'll never be without me, Anna." He lowered his hand from her face and pressed it against her heart. "I'm always in here. You'll never be alone."

And then his hands loosened, and then his face changed, and then his wife threw her arms around his limp torso, sobbing uncontrollably into his shirt. And the deafening machinery cried out with her in sympathetic agony.


	2. You'll Never Be Alone: Chinese

_**You'll Never Be Alone is translated to Chinese by vangeve.**_

John不顾护士的阻止，艰难地试图从床上坐起身，却带出了一阵猛烈的咳嗽。

"Anna."他虚弱地唤道。

"我在，John"Anna回应，紧抿嘴唇将低低的啜泣封在牙关。"我一直在。"

John伸出一只手，Anna拉住他用双手轻轻握住。那个护士，感谢上帝—她去打扫房间了，并且给Anna找了一把椅子。她感激地缓缓坐下，将他的手贴向自己的嘴唇和脸颊，缓缓摩挲。现在只有他们两个人，当她像往常一样倾身将头埋在丈夫的颈窝中时，泪水随着痛苦的啜泣压抑地流出。

John伸出双臂尽可能地环住他，让她靠得更舒适些。"到我怀里来。"他低声说。接着缓缓地，Anna爬上床躺在他身边，泪水模糊了双眼，她躺在左边而他在右边—像原来一样。

不愿再多想了，她抱住John，像是要用身体将他包裹起来一样（这是最后一次了）。她感到些许湿润在脖子上晕开。

"John？"她支起上半身看向他，环着他的手没有松开半分。而他脸上的表情伤痛地就像心要碎开，她俯身吻吮尽他的泪水，发现自己揪紧的心从未有过一丝释然与好转。

"Anna，"他轻声说，"我非常担心。"

Anna知道他所表达的深层含义，在战争时期，如果他用"担心"这样的词对她说话，通常意味着有什么事情要发生了。她清楚他的担心，她也十分害怕。但她不会让她的丈夫伤心，至少现在。（在他最后的几小时、几分钟...抑或最后一刻。）

"安心。"她小声要求，伸手爱抚他的脸颊然后温柔地亲吻他的额头。"不要担心，你现在的生活是如此美好，你总是做得如此完美，而未来也会如同这样。"

"Anna，在我死后..."

"不要再说了，"她语气坚决，用一个坚定的吻打断了他将要说出的话。"你会好转的，John，我相信—"她说不出口，无情的现实最终将她的意志碾得支离破碎，她将脸深深地埋进他的胸膛，身子不受控制的猛烈颤抖着发出断断续续的啜泣。John虚弱的抬起手将她慢慢搂紧，她能感觉到他在同她一起哭。

"我不愿离开你。"过了一会他平静了下来。

抬Anna起头看向他，然后环住他的头让他靠在自己柔软的胸膛上，"我知道。"她试图让自己的抽咽声不那么明显，"你永远在我心中，一切都会好的，John，我保证。"

John靠着她的胸口点了点头，突然他又猛烈地咳嗽起来，猛烈的可怕。强忍住泪水，Anna小心地拭去他嘴角的血迹，然后让他更加贴近心口。

他们相依静默了很长时间，许久John再一次看向她。

"我爱你。"他平静地说，一只手轻抚她的脸颊，"深入骨髓。我一直爱着你，Anna，比你知道的还要久。你给了我所不曾拥有、不曾想象的，你给了我整个世界。我从来没有如此渴望过生命，我最大的心愿就是让你一直陪着我。"

"我也希望。"她哽咽道，"我不能想象没有你的生活..."

"嘘，别这么说。"John拉起她的手贴向自己的脸和唇，就像不久前Anna所做的那样，他们经常这样安慰彼此，"我永远不会离开你，Anna，"在她脸颊上的手缓缓向下移去，直到按上她的心口，"我会一直在这儿，你永远不会一个人。"

然后他的手无力垂下；然后他的脸不复神采：然后他的妻子紧紧抱住他苍白僵硬的身躯，埋在他平整的衬衫中哭得撕心裂肺。

只有破旧的机器发出震耳欲聋的哭声陪她一起痛彻心扉。


End file.
